Okay, so I know protein is good for you. But in some forms, I just have to pass. On Survivor, the contestants get stranded only to crunch giant cockroaches with glee while assuring each other they need the protein. On Bizarre Foods with Andrew Zimmern the guy travels to Asia to eat deep-fried beetles out of baskets propped up on calf brains. I generally watch those episodes with a kid in front of me so I can hide my eyes behind them while they yell out, "EW! GROSS! Mom, didja see that? The EYEBALL on that grasshopper popped out when he bit it!"
So I was not pleased this morning to go out to the barn and, while filling up the twins' water bucket, hear, "bjjjjzzzzzt" and realize I had sucked up a bug. Not landed in my mouth or even swallowed it, I had INHALED it. It was stuck in my lung and I was hacking and gasping and trying to yell, "EW! GROSS! Didja see that?" but there was no one out there.....except the twins.
As I jumped around the barn trying to expell something the Survivor folks would have fought each other over, I realized the twins were watching me and bleating. Reno said, "Good heavens, woman! Will you be okay?" (only he said it in French because he is multi-lingual) and Victor bleated out, "Today is Tuesday!" (which it's not even close, it's Saturday but I already told you, he isn't so bright) and at that point I fell over from coughing so hard. Or maybe it was the beginning of Ebola or encephalitis or something.
Either way, when I opened my eyes, the goats were standing over me, chewing their cuds and snickering. Reno claimed he had performed CPR on me and was I planning on billing insurance or paying by credit card? As I pondered that, Victor leaned over and brayed, "It's TUESDAY!"
So I've had my protein today, but tonight....one of those kids has to go feed the goats.
~Donna
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